I often have a hard time with God's timing. When I am hurting or struggling or desperately praying about something I seem to think it is of some upmost importance of God's immediate action or attention. Ok, reality check Lisa....God already knows what is going on and how He is going to handle it. But one verse has been imbedded on my head for the past few weeks, ironically. It is Psalm 46:10 that says Be still, and know that I am God. I have been trying to do that but we all know that I am not the most patient person :) At least I have been trying so that is moving mountains in itself!
For the past few weeks, I have been struggling in my faith and my confidence in being God's child. I have been praying for God to reassure me. I have been tested quite often recently and have failed many times it seems. Part of the doubt in my confidence was that I was seeming to realize that maybe I only believed half of the gospel. I definitely believed that Jesus was born as God in the flesh and that He died on the cross for our sins. I always seemed to stop there without even realizing it. As I had been asking God in my prayers to reveal my flaws and sin that I still struggle with, he asked me if I believed that Jesus conquered death by raising from the dead three days later. That is the exact part where I always stopped. I mean I knew the story and all that but it wasn't something that was ever embedded in my heart I suppose. We can believe all we want that Jesus died on the cross as the ultimate sacrifice for our sins but it means nothing if he didn't conquer death. God reminded that to me and how I need to reinforce that into my mind and into my heart. God also revealed that just like Jesus being born again spiritually so am I. All of that junk that use to be my past which is now my story is because of the resurrection in Christ and in me!
A couple of nights ago, God revealed to me in a dream that my earthly father had died but at the end of the dream my dad was sitting in the room with all of us. I remember in my dream thinking what in the world was going on because my father was suppose to have passed away. But there he was...amongst us as if it was nothing out of the ordinary that he was there. I woke up wondering what that dream meant and what God was trying to tell me. In the dream, my earthly father has some how conquered death and was there in my presence again. Hmmm, sound familiar, Lisa?
God has been loving and gracious enough to speak to me and answer my prayers regarding my doubt in who He was, is, and is to come. He also let me know I am His. I must admit I gnawed on that bone of doubt a little bit for satan. However, I was able to throw it back because Christ came to my rescue this week. Thank you.
I'm sure this song isn't new for some but it is new to me. And guess what? God gave it to me this week. Again with the timing! I fell in love with it. This song is soooo me and for me!
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