Consequences and Hope

Where do I even begin? How does one begin to put into words the bone chilling recognition that God is clearly making Himself known in your midst? Not making Himself present... but known.  Does it mean that something didn't exist or wasn't present before we recognized it? No.

There are a plethora of things that are in our constant nearness and we may not acknowledge it or know it but when something makes itself known, it is active in its presence.  It is either bold and standing out, maybe even making noises or moving.  Often it's something we run in to or trip over with our feet.  On occasion it's something we've seen a million times but for whatever reason it's now drawing us in to its very being.  Sometimes it's something that is pointed out to us. Unfortunately and more often than not it is something that we just ignore. Without explanation, in the next moment, it makes itself KNOWN.

Sin can be viewed in so many ways and we as humans attach it to different levels.  Sometimes we even ok it because we diagnose it as the "little white lies" syndrome.  No harm done, right? We ignore it because it doesn't fit our lifestyle choices or we don't want to give up those pleasures.  We even go so far as supporting it because it's the politically correct thing to do and we should fight for the minorities, in most cases.  And sadly, we accept sin because we don't truly know the eternal severity or consequences of rebelling against God while we go about our days continuing to slap Him in the face only to vainly demand that He hold our very heads up in comfort when we have them hovered down in our own self destruction covered in filth and selfishness.  God doesn't put sin on different levels.  It's all rebellion.  Different sin requires different consequences but ANY sin to God is rebellion and is to be kept apart from Him.

As I have struggled with personal continual sin these past few months, I have had a rough, to say the least, past week.  As I could see my sin, individually and linked to someone else, unfolding I was deceived into thinking it was happening for a reason limited to the real issues at hand.  To recap as I blogged last time, my boyfriend had a change of plans regarding his attendance at a men's ministry because of work.  I was so upset and emotional about it all and directed my anger toward my boyfriend, his boss, and God.  Since then and in the past 36 hours I have been given the revelation that I was for the most part directing my anger inappropriately towards two of those individuals yet not including myself.  You see, I had also been given the divine privilege to serve in a women's ministry last month.  During that 12 week process of preparation through intimate time with God, my heart began to become hardened over time and I knew it.  I could feel it.  And I knew why.  At one point I was given the opportunity to write part of a script for the weekend.  I wanted to incorporate words of intimacy through a bride and bridegroom with that of biblical references from the Old Testament veil.  I had no trouble writing down the words concerning the veil.  That was easy. It was already there for me.  I just had to find it in the Bible.  I struggled for almost a week to come up with the words of intimacy.  How hard could it be to write about a bride and bridegroom and the love they share for one another?  Well, when you have totally deserted and strayed away from your own intimacy with God, He takes those words from you.  I write all of the time, not all of which I post, so to come up with words to put on a page shouldn't have been a big deal.  But it was a big deal to God and He wasn't going to allow me to partake in it in vain only for His precious brides that would be coming through that room to hear.  And so it was done.  I confessed this to my prayer team in which I was involved and told them where I was with my struggle to write and that I felt it was from a hardened heart.  Even though I had opened up somewhat to them as a group, the damage was done.  I was never given the words or thoughts of intimacy from Him.  I lost out on that.  God still lavished His love on me by allowing me to be a part of the weekend.  God's timing for that was already prepared.  My view on God's timing for it was based on my actions, not His.  

God has revealed a lot to me this past week about turning away from His desires and His ways but He has also reminded me of some things like His timing.  I am a firm believer in pre-destination and free will and to me it makes perfect sense on how they are intertwined but what I have become more aware of is how His timing is always perfect.  It's not God's timing that messes us up...it's where we are in God's timing that makes us or breaks us.  The moments of God making Himself known is already in the books to happen.  It's where we are in our walk with Him on how we will react to Him revealing Himself.  God revealed Himself in even mightier ways for this past weekend for the men's ministry and said once again that He will not be made a fool of.  And so it was.  He put a stop to the nonsense and was glorified even more for it. He still is revealing His purpose for the events of this past weekend even today.  

In even more depth, God has made Himself known to me in drastic ways the past 12 hours. The last time I shed this many tears in a day was over 4 years ago when watching my grandfather's life fade away before my very eyes.  God's wrath is just and perfect.  It is no fun to be on the other end of that.  It is no fun to be one who is being called out by God and it hurts even more to see ones we love being called out as well.  However, it is necessary and if I'm honest, I am thankful and blessed for it.  That doesn't mean that I am not hurt, sad, or wishing I had just been obedient to my Father.  In Deuteronomy 10:12-13, Moses said, "And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways and to love Him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments of the LORD and His statutes which I command you today for your good?"  FEAR THE LORD.  SERVE THE LORD.  KEEP HIS COMMANDMENTS.  

In response to the verse, I sometimes become so complacent in my ways and ignore my actions. I can't even say I forget because God gives me that Godly conviction to remind me.  I ignore it for my own pleasure and ease.  Do we even fear God anymore?  Did we ever?  This world reflects no.  We have belittled God into a sappy push over who will let us do whatever we want because "a good God would never let anything bad happen to us".  Society, and the ridiculousness of the Church, shoves down our throats to the point of vomiting that God is only loving, forgiving, gracious, and someone that we can wrap around our grimy fingers and that anything else is pure evil.  Well God is all of those things except the sappy push over but He is also Judge, wrathful, gets angry, and is jealous!  Those are righteous qualities that He has and those things do not come from evil.  Those characteristics are dished out FROM HIM because of evil!  Just as quickly as we like to proclaim the majesty of the heavens and that we all have a place there waiting for us, we just as quickly dismiss the nightmare of hell.  They are both real, not just one.  And... if we feared the Lord more, we would become aware of both of those realities.  I don't even know what to say on serving the Lord.  I mean who can you serve that you don't even respect or in some cases don't even know or believe in?  The sad thing is that many of us believe in God yet don't know Him as anything else from the man on the moon.  Knowing God and believing in God can be two points that are farthest from each other or the same point.  I pray that if you are honest with yourself and you can't say that you KNOW God rather than knowing of Him, you will ask Him to make Himself known to you. I would love to pray for you.  And on the commandment issue, I know we all like to throw that one out the window because it's "Old Testament".  Yes, some of the Old Testament isn't applicable today but fearing the Lord and serving the Lord is still just as intact today as it was when it was written.  It isn't a matter of whether or not we scored accordingly on our spiritual gift test to see if this is something that fits within our realm of possibilities.  In the above verse Moses asked "what does the Lord require of you"?  Require.  Not suggest or think about.  To me, a requirement from the Lord is a commandment.  So just because it doesn't have a number 1 through 10 next to it or doesn't involve some sort of animal being slain and offered up doesn't mean it isn't still commanded. God will not be mocked or taken lightly.  At some point, it will be dealt with and I am beyond thankful that my "dealing with" is on this earth and not when I am standing in front of His face!  When those consequences are handed to me, all I can do is surrender and submit to His authority that of which is hopefully lathered in humility.

Between my week and certain conversations with my boyfriend, some fitting revelations from God that He has willingly yet undeservedly given to me today....

My morning devotional verse of the day: Roman 13:8 - Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law (clear confirmation regarding a specific conversation on Sunday with my boyfriend regarding finances)

My daily morning text from my sweet friend, Debi: Hebrews 4:16 - Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need (confirmation of Him hearing my cries last night when I repented in a not so worldly attractive way)

I don't even remember how He showed me this one: 1 John 2:1 - My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One (confirmation in my prayers and exact words last night for Him to be my defender)

He gave me this early this morning in response to my exact words last night through repentance and prayer...

Jesus Is Our Defender

12/01/2011 BY PTR. NOEL M. MORANDARTE 

He will not tolerate sin in a true believer’s life but He will certainly defend him from the condemnation of the accuser because He has already redeemed him with His most precious blood. When you are confronted by malicious attacks and gossips, do you try to fight for your own name and dignity or do you allow the Lord to be your defender? “The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold (Psalm 18:2).”

Yes, the Lord rebukes, corrects, and disciplines whom He loves but He will never leave them without a defense against the devil who prowls like a roaring lion. He will stand at our side and answer every lie that the enemy throws against us and give us strength so we can proclaim Him, our very message, so the world may know Him.

We must always set the Lord always before us; that is, let us always acknowledge that the battle is the Lord’s. We may have been enlisted as soldiers in His Kingdom but it is the Lord’s Kingdom, and it is the Lord’s fight. Even David, who loved the Lord so much, who stood up and fought against Goliath, that nine-foot giant Philistine who disgraced the Name of the Lord, said, “This day the LORD will hand you over to me…(1 Samuel 17:46).” “….the LORD saves; for the battle is the LORD’s and He will give all of you into our hands (v. 47).

So you see, the Lord will be the one to fight for you. He will hand over the enemy to your hand. He will save you. The battle is the Lord’s. It’s not and it’s never going to be the other way around.

The Lord is our defender. Let Him fight the battle for you. He is our shield. “We are more than conquerors through Him who loved us (Romans 8:37).”

I tend to have "Repeat Songs of the Day" and will literally play it continually if it is on my heart for a particular reason.  My repeat song has now been going 2 days and I honestly feel it just as deeply right now as it plays and as I did when I started listening to it yesterday.  This song will always remind me of Jeffrey's and my time with God last night and I will always be taken back to that picture of us waving the white flag.  A man's voice starting off with just the simple yet pleasing sound of strumming a guitar with God's words playing through his fingertips and voice.  What a reminder of confession, separation from God, our complete and total need for Him, our sin, His grace, freedom, Jesus! My life in a nutshell these past hours!  

Matt Maher - Lord, I Need You

• Lord, I come, I confess
  Bowing here I find my rest
  Without You I fall apart
  You're the One that guides my heart
  
  Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
  Every hour I need You
  My one defense, my righteousness
  Oh God, how I need You
  
  Where sin runs deep Your grace is more
  Where grace is found is where You are
  And where You are, Lord, I am free
  Holiness is Christ in me
  
  Teach my song to rise to You
  When temptation comes my way
  And when I cannot stand I'll fall on You
  Jesus, you're my hope and stay

  
  

• 
  

You want favor??? Honor Me then.

So I was having a fairly uneventful morning then I receive a phone call from someone I love dearly.  How is it that so many times in our lives that unknowingly dreaded "phone call" can totally transform our day or even our lives?  One moment earlier everything was fine and the next moment it changes.  No matter how small or big the situation, it affects us and the ones we love.

My boyfriend, Jeffrey, called and I was told immediately that the call was for prayers and wisdom.  He sounded extremely burdened and anxious.  Without going into great detail, he has a commitment that was planned 3 months ago.  He is supposed to be going away to serve in a men's ministry so.....of course he is needed at work all weekend as he finds out this morning.  Oh and by the way, he is supposed to be leaving TOMORROW.  Yeah.

Although I didn't give it away on the phone, I instantly became over-protective and angry.  I told him I was going to have some friends pray about it, pray myself, and then return his call. I hung up the phone and was asking myself if this was really happening.  Seriously?  Of course, I'm now angry at Jeffrey, the person asking him to work, and God.  So why am I angry and all three of them?  Well, I felt angry at Jeffrey because he clearly didn't relay the importance and necessity of this weekend with his boss (mind you this is want was going on in my head so it wasn't necessarily the case).  I felt angry at his boss for being selfish enough to ask Jeffrey to work knowing Jeffrey already had this commitment and I got angry at God for allowing this to happen.  My main beef was with God.  How could He allow Jeffrey to be put in this situation?  God certainly allowed Jeffrey to be led into committing to this, allowed him to go through the process for 12 weeks, and now this?  The day before he was to leave he is just suppose to choose work or Him?  If I'm honest I was borderline infuriated.

So I texted my friends asking for their prayers and then prepped myself for prayer.  I turned on my gospel playlist to help my mood prior to bringing myself before the Lord.  I browsed through my playlist to try and find the right song or what I thought would be appropriate for the situation and my mood.  I finally played "It Is Well With My Soul".  As the music started I crouched over and just closed my eyes and I began to pray.  However, it was not well with my soul and I voiced that.  I began telling God that I was not happy about this, this predicament was NOT well with my soul, and then had the audacity to question Him and His purpose in this.  To make things worse, my heart was aching for Jeffrey because I knew he was struggling with this decision to the point of physical sickness - which is not of his character. When someone I love is hurting or struggling, my emotions tend to lean towards anger rather than sadness.  Jeffrey was burdened so I was burdened.  I was pleading with God to show favor towards Jeffrey and to remember the heart that Jeffrey has for Him.  I wanted God to honor my prayers,  Jeffrey's prayers, and whoever else we had praying.  I wanted those prayers honored on the basis of God reflecting on Jeffrey's heart.  Although my intentions were good, I was basing this on Jeffrey's heart rather than God's character.  Know what the next song to play on my playlist was?  "Jealous".  God is a jealous God and has every right to be without question or even answering for that matter.

After I wrapped up my prayer degrading God's character, I eventually asked for myself to not make this about me or anything else but Him.  Well, I had already made it about anything but Him.  God simply told me that if He wanted to remind Jeffrey and/or myself that He is to be put first and foremost, then He could do it any way that He chooses.  If this request of Jeffrey's boss was to be some sort of reality check on what's really important in our lives, then so be it. Not that choosing work or the weekend was the right or wrong answer but that no matter the situation, we are to always think of Him first and seek His Will - "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your way My ways.  As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

But....much to my surprise, God makes His next question and statement directly to me.  He says, "You want favor?  Honor me then."

Yeah, just let that soak in for a moment.....

Ok, isn't this suppose to be about Jeffrey or the weekend or something?  How did this get turned on me?  Well, He answers that for me too.  For one, I had the nerve to actually question His motives and His way about doing it.  Secondly, I was asking for God to show favor and honor us.  Now I could obviously pull out one of my verses I always cling to - James 5:16 which speaks of how the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective or even the Matthew 18:19 that talks about gathering with two or more and asking for anything and it will be done.  Who knows, maybe I did.  However, in typical Lisa fashion I looked up the word favor and the word honor.

Favor - to give special regard to; something done or granted out of goodwill
Honor - high regard or great respect given; a showing of merited respect

I also wondered if there was anything in the bible that spoke of honor and favor together. Well one verse came up and in a version that I NEVER read....

The CES version say God shows favor to those who honor Him, listening to their cries for help and saving them - Psalm 145:19 

Now I am only speaking of myself right now but God was absolutely spot on.  Big surprise. Some of my actions and lifestyle choices here lately have not been very honoring to God.  I was reminded that I am living in areas of clear disobedience yet asking for God to show favor to my pleas.  God even went a little deeper and told me that I, at times, am not even honoring to Jeffrey.  I have the ability to have an influence in Jeffrey's life and I tend to take that lightly.  

I think that's enough said on that issue.

To end things and back track a bit, I had been listening to WDJC all morning, prior to speaking to Jeffrey, waiting for a song to come on that I was wanting to download to my playlist but I didn't know the name of it.  After my ordeal this morning and getting out of my bratty mood, I felt led to write about this.  I sat down at my computer, got situated, and the song finally came on the radio.  I immediately downloaded it and have had it on repeat all day.  It's "His Kind of Love" by Group 1 Crew.  I looked at my clock and it came on at 1pm exactly.  One.  First.  Put Me first is what I kept hearing.  That is what is honoring to Him.

Isn't It Ironic?

When I was a prostitute When I was a drunk
When I was an addict When I was high on pride
When I was a rebel When I was an adulteress
When I was lost When I bought all the lies

My dreams and fantasies were unzipped boxes, diamonds all around
jet airliners waiting, snow on the ground
My prince charming whisking me away 
no worries or cares, only how I would play

You were watching all along
brokenhearted and crushed within Your spirit
Resounding Your name upon my deaf ears
not even fighting to hear it

My heart cried out for Your presence
while melting away like chocolate in my hands
To make Yourself known
like trumpets playing from ten thousand bands

Your pursuit leaves me exhausted even more
as I can't keep up with running to afar
Keeping my back turned
the water from my eyes are filling up the jars

But it's my eyes You want to see 
to hold my cheeks in Your hands
To give me all You have to offer
love that covers the lands

It was, it is, will always be
Your sting that bites me as a sinner
But Your mercies rain on me for free

and covers my filth void of 30 pieces of silver

My prayers are void my thoughts are lost
I'm wandering about my ways
lost in translation
I'm being swallowed by the days

The moon shines brightly and the sun begins to fade
another day gone, another time lost
I toss and turn all the night long
wondering if my place is at the foot of the cross

Satan stands at my door and crouching all around
are demons from my past calling out my name
They scratch my back and caress my hair
telling me it's all the same

Impostors making me feel at ease
telling me the world is mine
With gentle whispers soft as the breeze
pulling me in line by line

I pound my hands thrashing back and forth
wondering where You are, why You're leaving me here on the floor
It's then I realize I have no strength no power
without you as my Lord, My Defender of every hour

I want to fall in love
with the One who loves me most
Who praises me and treasures me 
as His Beloved - that I can boast

He is mine and I am His
in that there is no shame
Nothing can separate the love He has for me 
the one He calls by name

~Anonymous

Of Course This Post Is Gonna Be About Gay Marriage

Where to begin?  I am so overwhelmed with thoughts and feelings because of all the news and Facebook drama on gay marriage that I can't even put together a complete thought.

I guess I"ll start with some of the comments that I saw that really struck a nerve with me and continues to send a chill up my spine (as my mom would say) the more I see them.

"Who am I to judge someone else?"
"I don't want you telling me what I do or believe is wrong."
"The Bible says for us to love one another."
"The gay population is here to stay." - Yep that one is a doozy!
"We were all made equal."

First issue - "Who am I to judge someone else?"  Well, first of all, if you mean that you are in no place to judge someone then I applaud you for somewhat subtly admitting your sinful nature and that you fall short of taking on the title of Judger.  However, if you are saying that in regards to not holding one another accountable then I take back my applaud.  Accountability couldn't be more biblical.  I struggle with which verses not to share on this because there are so many!  Here's a few NIVs...

Proverbs 24:24-25
Whoever says to the guilty, "You are innocent," will be cursed by peoples and denounced by nations.  But it will go well with those who convict the guilty, and rich blessing will come on them. God is not going to honor your "I won't judge anyone" attitude while you sit back and let others self destruct.

Ezekiel 3:18-19
When I say to a wicked person, ‘You will surely die,’ and you do not warn them or speak out to dissuade them from their evil ways in order to save their life, that wicked person will die for their sin, and I will hold you accountable for their blood.  But if you do warn the wicked person and they do not turn from their wickedness or from their evil ways, they will die for their sin; but you will have saved yourself.  Don't like the word "accountable" that was chosen to be used in the NIV version?  Ok, well the King James version says "but his blood I require at thine hand".  Hmmm...

Oh yeah, here's a cute little proverb...

Proverbs 12:15
The way of the fool seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice.  Interesting.  Who is giving the advice if we aren't to be holding one another accountable???  And to whom is the wise listening??

Kind of reminds me of one of my most favorite verses...

James 5:16
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.  The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.  Confessing sin?  To one another?  Sounds to me that we are to not only hold others accountable but we are to be held accountable by others. Why else would we be confessing our sins to one another and praying for each other?  And just as a side note, nowhere in that verse is there harsh judgment, finger pointing, picking on someone, or treating someone unfairly.

Galatians 6:1
Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently.  But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.

Second issue - "I don't want you telling me what I do or believe is wrong."  Ok, well that's just prideful.  Now would I want just anyone coming up to me telling me how horrible of a person I am for my beliefs or the way I live my life?  No.  Who would?  Which is part of the problem for those of us who attack and condescend and do it unloving.  But to make a statement that you don't want others telling you what you do is wrong is being selfish and prideful.  Guess what?  You really may be in the wrong.

Third issue - "The Bible says for us to love one another."  Yes.  Yes it does.  However, I personally feel that this is one of THE MOST ABUSED AND TWISTED verses of the Bible!  I assume most of you that throw this verse out there are referring to the John 13 verse that says, "A new command I give you:  Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another."  Loving one another is not letting each other do whatever we want, especially when it's a clear indicator of rebellion.  It's not letting each other live in continual sin and deception.  It's not "staying out of their business" when it is eternal life and death on the line.  Please don't twist that verse or any other verse remotely like that to fit to your agenda or as a pass for twisted anti-legalism.

Fourth issue - "The gay population is here to stay."  Seriously?  Am I watching Grease right now?  Is Rock N Roll Is Here To Stay playing right now?  Now it's playing in my head...

Rock N Roll is here to stay it will never die
It was meant to be that way though I don't know why
I don't care what people say
Rock N Roll is here to stay

Ok, the gay population is here to stay and it will never die and we don't know why and we don't care what people say soooo..... everybody just jump on board?  Well murders, adulterers, and thieves have always been around also.  Do we just need to jump on board with them and just let them go about doing what they think isn't wrong?  Or do we just need to love them too without holding them accountable?  I know every time I turn around people are screaming they want justice and how people should be held accountable for their actions.  Being homosexual isn't a crime in the United States so I'm not intending to compare the consequences for a homosexual verses a murderer but to make a comment like the above mentioned is absurd.

Fifth issue - "We were all made equal."  Where have I been because I'm still having trouble finding a biblical basis to back up that comment?  I'm not aware of anything in the bible that says we were all created equal.  I guess if you mean that we were all created in the image of God, then I can see where you are coming from but that doesn't make us equal....and I'm pretty sure it doesn't make us equal in the way you are using the term.  God loves us equally but we were not made or born equally.  And quite honestly, God does show favor on some.  Although if you just need a verse to cling to on equality, I would recommend Galatians 3:28 that says There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male or female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.   So if you really want to be have harmony and equality for all and us all be the same, be in Christ because God sees ALL who is in Christ to be blameless and pure and clothed in righteousness.

The fact of the matter is that there will always be disagreements and differences of opinions, lifestyles, and beliefs.  That doesn't mean we can't or shouldn't love each other.  Heck, the bible says to love and pray for our enemies so I'm not disputing that point.  I am disputing the point that judgment and accountability are equal or the same.  They aren't.  And they are both biblical.  What bothers and concerns me is hating that my children are growing up in this Babylonian society in which we live.  We, as a general consensus, continually turn our backs on God and live life how we want.  We think we are owed something and want others to pay for it or turn it over to us for nothing.  We want nothing to do with God until we need something.  We don't want to live by His "rules" because that would actually be us submitting to a higher power and we all know we are too good for that, right?  We all deserve to be happy rather than holy.  

I'm often reminded that the Bible isn't a 1000 piece puzzle set that we put together to make the picture that we want.  We don't get to pick the pieces that we like and throw away the pieces we don't want.  We don't get to substitute or change the pieces.  There is only one picture!  We can choose to put the pieces together THAT WE WERE GIVEN to reflect the picture that God made. Just because a piece  doesn't sit well with us doesn't mean it can be discarded.  Maybe if it doesn't sit well with us, then we are the wrong piece and we need to be reshaped by the Creator of the puzzle.  I hate to say it but if that puzzle you call the Bible doesn't fit your agenda, then maybe you don't believe in the Bible.  There are a lot of things in the Bible that hit me like a ton of bricks sometimes but that's only because I am living a life away from the desire of God in that area.  It doesn't mean I can just say "Well, I don't like that so I don't believe that part.  I'm going to stick with the good stuff like don't judge and love all.  Oh and don't forget about the GRACE part where I can do whatever I want but it's ok because I have grace.  Jesus said so."  

James 2:10 says For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it.  

James 2 is one of the many reminders that we will always be guilty of sin, no matter the size of the sin.  I personally believe homosexuality is a sin.  However,  let's not put homosexuals on some sort of pedestal where their sin deserves more attention or a lack of.  I 100% believe that the enemy loves devouring the covenant of marriage and the perspective that is given to marriage.  It is to be a reflection of Christ and the Church.  It is to be with the Bride and Bridegroom, not Bride and Bride, not Bridegroom and Bridegroom.  

So what, now being born gay is the issue at hand.  We are born liars too so does make it ok for us to lie all of the time?  Some of us are born with physical handicaps.  Does that mean that someone who is born deaf has to stay deaf or are we not always promoting for that person to receive some sort of healing or even a hearing aid so that person can hear?  Are babies that are born addicted to drugs because their mother was strung out still justified in living a life of a drug addict?  I don't recall any of those issues being the fault of the one born.  May not make sense, however, it still happened and God allowed it for whatever reason.  The good news is that submitting our lives to Christ, overpowers all of that sin - regardless of what it is.

Joel 2:16 Gather the people, consecrate the assembly; bring together the elders, gather the children, those nursing at the breast.  Let the bridegroom leave his room and the bride her chamber.

Honestly all of this discord going on with gay marriage isn't the issue at hand.  The issue is that too many of us care less about God or His Word.  He is revered as a God of convenience who we can get mad at when we want and love when we want.  He is not at the center of our desires and we are not a God fearing society who is after God's own heart.  Funny....we could learn a lot from King David, who we would probably consider an immoral barbaric brute! He would be obliterated in our society but he always went back to desiring God and His heart.  He cried out to God!  Yet amongst all of David's shortcomings, I'd say God still had favor upon him.  Wonder why???....

I'll sum up this post with the following...

Romans 1:18-32

New International Version (NIV)

God’s Wrath Against Sinful Humanity

¹⁸ The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, ¹⁹ since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. ²⁰ For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.
²¹ For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. ²² Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools ²³ and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like a mortal human being and birds and animals and reptiles.
²⁴ Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. ²⁵ They exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen.
²⁶ Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. ²⁷ In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.
²⁸ Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done. ²⁹ They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, ³⁰ slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; ³¹ they have no understanding, no fidelity, no love, no mercy. ³² Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them.

Who Is She Talking To???

As a sweet friend of mine, Jenni, often says, "I am giddy with giddiness", and that's exactly how I feel today so I am stealing her unspoken patent for the day :)  This may very likely be one of those posts that only I connect to and one of those "you had to be there moments" but I still just had to share my giddiness today for God!

I have been blank and empty on my thoughts the past few weeks as far as jotting down my feelings here on this thing I call a blog.  I've struggled with even feeling led to write anything and the few times I did think about writing were going to turn into venting sessions and vainly temporarily release some negative junk I had going on in my head.  Not good and certainly wouldn't have been glorifying the Lord in any way.  Thankfully, the Lord reminded me not to post such issues and move on with a different attitude...one that was focused on Him.  Throughout these past few weeks, I have struggled with that.  Not intentionally so much to make things about myself but it happened nonetheless.  These past couple of months have required much prayer, focus, intention, and devotion on my part.  I have failed miserably but was determined to stay on the path and not choose another.  At times, I became disconnected, weary, frustrated with myself, and doubtful in whether God was hearing me or if He was going to reveal Himself to me.  At times I even wondered why I was in the middle of all of this and why God chose to put me in a situation I was clearly not capable of handling.  I knew the answers but allowed the enemy to creep in on some of that - affecting my mindset and my heart.

I have been holding on to certain verses throughout these past 2 months but I never held on to one in particular... that just so happens to be taped to my computer monitor.  As I am sitting here, God showed it to me again, this time with conviction in my righteousness...

The NIV version of 2 Chronicles 16:9 says For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.  You have done a foolish thing, and from now on you will be at war.

The King James version of 2 Chronicles 16:9 says For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him. Herein thou hast done foolishly: therefore from henceforth thou shalt have wars.

That verse mentions nothing about just being committed, sometimes committed, or partially committed.  It says fully committed.  Should you choose to read the other version it speaks of a perfect heart toward Him.  Not good, not sweet, not even great.  Perfect.  I faltered many times these past few weeks, as I do everyday of my life, and did not remain fully committed to God.  If I continue reading that verse then I have to know that I have been foolish in doing so and with that comes war and heartache.  Apart from my total and complete reliance on God I have nothing.  Choosing to face in any direction other than in the face of God will always leave me vulnerable and at war - without God on my side.  I know I will never be able to have a perfect heart toward God...and He knows that too.  Aren't you thankful that we don't live in Old Testament times?  Words and thoughts can't even express how thankful I am for Jesus.  My dependence on His death clothes my imperfect heart.  My dependency on His Word fills my imperfect heart.  My dependency on His Lordship completes my imperfect heart.  When I admit that I am helpless and useless without Him, I am turning over myself and my ways to Him.

I sometimes mention that I often just look around at my surroundings and just stare at God's majesty.  Whether I'm driving or sitting outside or looking out a window, I look at His creation of the skies, trees, flowers, animals, the stars, the sun, the moon and clearly see His hand in all of it.  I honestly am in awe when reflecting on all of it.  His presence seems so obvious to me and I wonder how others could even doubt Him.  What could be better than blatantly looking at something so intricate and majestic that God made from nothing and allows us to live amongst it all??  What could be better than seeing all of the provisions around me that allow me to sustain life? He provides my food, air, water, shelter, and clothing literally in front of my eyes.  Nothing goes unforgotten.  

What could melt my heart more than that?.... When God speaks to me, that's what.  When He actually reveals something to me that is only for me in that moment.  When He answers a specific prayer that only I have prayed and He then tells me about it.  Not that anything God created on this earth is vague, but it's when the spirit of God speaks to my heart intimately that is better than all of that other stuff.  When I know God heard me.  When I know God didn't forget my plea.  When I know that God is showing me exactly how He had it all orchestrated the entire time and then chooses to let me in on it.  That is what is better!  It's when all the pieces of the puzzle that seem random, yet there, start to fit together.  The pieces that you thought you were putting together for His glory all of a sudden don't hold a candle to the puzzle that God just showed you!  It's those moments like I had in the car on the way home this morning where you literally say out loud, "Oh my God!  That's it!  That is it!"  No one in the car with you.  Just you. You are talking and laughing out loud because God has just shown you something or given you that one piece of the puzzle that makes it all fit together.  Yes, that was me this morning :)  

If you can't say that you have had those intimacies with God, then I pray that you surrender your life to His Lordship so you can experience those moments even with your imperfect heart! You can't possibly imagine the magnitude of what that feels like to hear God whisper something in your ear or put something in front of your eyes that is only for you in that moment.  It's those precious moments where you are just left sitting or standing there, barely able to compile an organized thought, and the only thing that even makes sense is to proclaim to the unfathomable God, "You are I AM".... and He replies "You Are Mine."

Leave Me Alone...I'm Busy

Seems like the theme here lately for myself and so many I know has been weariness and fatigue.  Our lives are so busy that we just drain ourselves.  We mention over and over that we need more time in the day to get things done or that we must spend our quiet time with God in the mornings because nights are out or vice versa; that we must spend our quiet time with God at night because mornings are out.  Reality is that we rarely do either because we are too exhausted by the end of the day and we are too sleepy in the mornings to get up in time to spend time alone with Him.  We have 24 hours in the day and we seriously make comments about there not being enough time in the day to get things done?  I totally include myself in that statement.  Ok well, hey, what about this?...maybe we cram too much in the day.  Maybe we choose to watch too much tv or stay on the internet too long.  Maybe we cart our children around to their ridiculous amounts of extra-curricular activities that we not only exhaust ourselves but them as well.  Maybe we make everything else a priority over rest and quiet time with God.  

Why do we think that rest can take a back seat to our lives?  Why do we think we can be more productive by shoving as much into our days as possible?  Is it because we think we are accomplishing more things on the checklist if we get it done?  10 things checked off verses only 5?  Does that really make us more productive?  As you may have guessed by now, I like to look up the definition of words I use just to have some clarity.  Did you know that the definition of productive is to yield products, benefits, or profit?  Great.  So now I know that we are benefitting ourselves with junk on the internet and tv, in the books we read, and in the activities that we have our children to believe are priorities like sports and social clubs at a pace that makes us say that there just isn't enough time in the day or that we will just function on minimal rest.  I don't see how that is beneficial in the first place much less to a point to where it makes us physically ill at times and has us so irritable and unpleasant to be around. How is it beneficial to put such emphasis on superficial materialism and self indulgence over rest and quiet time with God?  Crazy thing is that we are more willing and likely to listen to a medical doctor who will most certainly tell us that rest is a necessity for healthy living, which it is, over what our Creator tell us.

What I find most interesting is the amount of professing Christians that find minimal to no time to rest, myself included.  Why do I find this interesting?  God has been revealing that answer to me by showing me that Jesus made time to rest and pray.  Jesus made it a priority to have quiet time with the Father.  Aren't we Christians supposed to be followers of Christ? Aren't we supposed to be following His example?  So, if Jesus made rest and prayer a priority then why don't we?  

One of the most obvious parts of scripture that comes to mind regarding rest is in Genesis where God declares the Sabbath holy and a day of rest.  Genesis 2: 2-3 says By the seventh day God had finished the work He had been doing; so on the seventh day He rested from all His work.  Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it He rested from all the work of creating that He had done.  God pretty much made rest a priority from the get go. Soooo....the God of the universe rested yet we think we are too important or busy to rest ourselves?  Hmmm....

Ok, so let's look at Jesus.  In Mark 6:31 He tells the apostles, "Come away by yourselves to a desolate place a rest a while".  In Luke 5, Jesus' fame spreads and verses 15-16 say But now even more the report about Him went abroad, and great crowds gathered to hear him and to be healed of their infirmities.  But he would withdraw to desolate place and pray.  Jesus was in the midst of His ministry and performing miracles yet stopped to spend alone time with the Father.  Luke 22:39-46 speaks of Jesus praying on the Mount of Olives.  He told the disciples to pray so that they wouldn't "enter into temptation" and then He left them and prayed.  These are just some of the parts of scripture that refer to rest and prayer.  It seems to me that the bible makes it pretty clear on the importance of quiet time with the Father.  I still can't get over the fact that Jesus stopped in the midst of His greatness in all that He was doing to spend alone time with God yet we are too arrogant and prideful to stop our meaningless nonsense of a schedule to have our alone time with Him.  It may not be intentional pride but it is what it is.  

A book I've been reading, Simple Devotion, talks a lot about just walking with God daily.  That no matter how much we DO or how much we are involved in with over the top things for God, it really doesn't matter if we have zero to little prayer life.  What good does it do to participate in a couple of big events a year for the Kingdom when we haven't even spoken to our God? Reminds me of Luke 13:22-30 where Jesus is being asked who will enter Heaven.  Jesus' response is that MANY will try to enter but will not.    They will plead and respond with how they prophesied in His name.  They will be told that He never knew them.  Those are pretty powerful and scary words from Jesus in those verses.  Jesus says that many will try to enter and be turned away.  Many??   That seems pretty probable that most professing Christians will be hearing those exact words.  I'm certainly not saying that if we spend quiet time with God daily that we are saved but I think it's something worth diving into and doing a little self-reflection on our hearts desire for the Lord versus our life.

If we are too busy or tired to spend adequate time in prayer then clearly we are not getting enough down time or rest....and if we aren't getting enough down time or rest, it's probable that we are investing our time in things not worth getting exhausted over but hey, that's just my guess...

Thank you, Lord, for revealing my sin to me with truth and Your Word and I pray that You will continue to change my heart to be more of a reflection of Yours.